somedays

maybe that's just it. Maybe I am meant to be alone, and maybe people aren't at my disposal. Maybe I shouldn't want to lie about little things and maybe doors are flying open I'm just too caught up in staying constant that I'm being blinded. Maybe I'm not what I always thought I was, but wait. I'm not everything that everyone wants for me. Two different planes. Not even comparable. I don't want to say yes, and I can't even give a genuine "thank you" when people try to plan out my life in a direction I've never considered for myself. I turn the paper and read from their perspective and I try to get it. I try to comprehend and sometimes I just end up banging my head on the table. Thank you or I'm sorry or hello. Maybe I'm meant to be alone in this.